My Brother, My Friend

A revised version of my speech.

Tian Leng, or more fondly known as Jack among his friends, was born on the 1st of February, 1986. With similar characteristics to the mythical dragon, Tian Leng, which means “Sky Dragon” in Chinese, was adventurous, always unpredictable, sometime uncontrollable, intelligent, trust-worthy and a strong protector of his family, friends and loved ones. I used to tell him, “you’re a sky dragon born in the year of tiger. You have a very strong name. You’ll do great things in future.”

Many of you wouldn’t know. But his favourite comics weren’t Superman, or Spiderman or any of those action heroes. He grew up reading Doraemon. He had a whole collection of them and sometimes, watched it on RTM 1, even in high school. He probably wouldn’t tell you because it’s not very cool. He was rather fat during his childhood days. Some aunties in PD town used to call him ‘tua pui’.

Maybe that was what prompted him to go on a diet. He used to starve himself with just tomato and cucumber sandwich for dinner. He was so determined, so much so that he lost so much weight and everyone had a shock.

That is Tian Leng. If he was passionate about something, he would buy magazines and books on that particular subject and master it. So for example when he was body-building himself, he bought tonnes of body-building magazines. He had posters of Bruce Lee and The Rock, and really thick autobiography of Arnold Schzernegger.

He and I fought a lot when we were young. I remember this one time where the fight got so bad, I slapped him and he punched me so hard in the stomach. Then we looked at each other for a few seconds, and we both started crying. As we are much older now, he was, still is, my best supporter in whatever that I do. He was always there for me without much question. The last event he helped me out with was 2-3 weeks ago. He did all of the heavy-lifting and asked me if he could use my things for his college events. He then said, "Eh, sis, event over liau yo. Let's celebrate" and brought 3 glasses of champagne. This is my one and only latest shot with him, celebrating with champagne after the event.

His first sport was sailing. But he wasn’t passionate about it. During that time, instead of breaking wind, he looked down into the water and searched for turtles and fishes. So, that led to his other passion – fishing. After dad bought him his first two wheeled bicycle, he would cycle off on his own around town with his fishing rod. Sometimes making new friends with old uncles sitting by the harbour in town. So from there, he learnt a few tricks or two about fishes and fishing. He was rebellious. I was told that it runs in the Khoo family. We never knew of his whereabouts but he was always home for dinner because that was the time that mom and dad would be home. He also took badminton lessons and swimming lessons, and represented school in these two sports. Tried tennis, but didn’t like it. He was already very enterprising even in primary school. Because of his interest in fishes, he would cycle alone to the pet shop. He would buy birds, and mark up a few cents and sold them to his friends. He then used the money to buy fish. His first pet fish died the second day. Then he bought a few more and they all died. But after many trials and error, his best pet the Arowana, grew into a beautiful fish, and he sold it after many years for about RM2,000. Among his many experiments, he also tried to rear birds, cats, hamsters, rooster and even goose. The goose was…a nightmare. He suggested snake thereafter and we put a stop to it! He was really the person to speak to if you wanted to open a pet shop. He grew up watching National Geographic and Discovery channel before football and ESPN took over.

He wasn’t the brightest student in class, but he was well known among his teachers because of his cheeky, playful yet lovable nature. There was one time, where Tian Leng got angry with a girl who apparently back-stabbed him. So he and his partner-in-crime, Wai Seng, put glue on her chair and she sat down on it. This was in high school. They were both severely punished by the discipline master. When my dad was called in by the discipline master; he also didn’t know whether to scold him or to laugh.

Finding a balance between studies, sports and curriculum, Tian Leng was also the Vice President of Leo Club, and represented PD high school in swimming, cycling and cross-country running. In college, he became active in football, futsal and basketball. I was told that he also played squash in Genting. So, I guess you can say that Jack is really Jack of all trades! Was that how he got his English name?


Last week, he was asking me about blogging and I referred some famous blog sites, such as kennysia.com and Patrick Teoh. Now, he has a blog site dedicated to him. It is very sweet of Kwek to start this blog as a tribute to his good friend. Thanks Kwek.

Tian Leng taught us all a few lessons. First, his departure is a lesson to us all that life is short, unpredictable, and definitely, not within our control no matter how fit, strong and healthy a person is. He told me he wanted to accompany me for my business trip to Sabah in January because he wanted to climb Mount Kinabalu with his Sabahan friends. We were planning for a family trip to Macau. Bought the tickets already. It is actually a family trip after many years and he was looking forward to it, researching about Macau’s attractions online. We were also planning for June June’s sweet 16 birthday this coming 27 December. He was also looking forward to completing his degree overseas, telling my mom that he might switch to Australia instead of Switzerland because that can help save some money. He admired Tan Sri Lim Goh Tong. Told me that one of his dreams is to set up his own hotel one day, some day. Just last week, while we were on our way back from KL, he told me that maybe being a politician sounds fun. “Talk bullshit and earn millions.”

See, we can plan as much as we want in life. But the moment you take life for granted, everything that you plan for becomes meaningless.

Tian Leng also showed us that life was meant to be lived to the fullest. He was never into winning medals or prizes or being the best, but whatever he did, he did it out of love and passion for it. He followed his heart and lived a meaningful life, and one that we can all be proud of.
He also showed us that it is the imperfections of a person that makes him beautiful. He was someone who had many talents but never realise it. He gave in to temptations but was always aware of his mistakes, and openly admitted it when asked. He was always insecure about himself. His palms would get all sweaty if pretty girls spoke to him. Yet, his friends are so multi-racial and ranging from students more junior than him to seniors more senior than me, and uncles more senior than our dad. He was never the loud, live of a party kind of person but he lighted up the life of people around him with his silly jokes and goofy character. I keep thinking that the one person we need now in this situation is Tian Leng to just say something that is totally out of this world and crack us up.

For someone so physically strong, he had many fears too. He was afraid of ghosts. He was afraid of cockroaches. There was once I asked him to help me kill a cockroach in my room. The roach flew up and he ran out of the room swearing, then asked me to handle it myself coz he can’t handle flying roaches. He was afraid of being alone. So he constantly surrounded himself with friends. The only time you’d find him alone was… his ‘shitting’ time. He was afraid of heights. Life has many ironies and it is ironic that it was a fall from height that took his life.

He never saw himself as a sociable person. Yet, I look at all of his friends who turned up at the funeral and I would just like to say to him that he is the best PR guy I have ever known. He was a people person. He got along well with everyone. He was always real. He was not pretentious. What you see if what you get, unless of course, if he was trying to play a trick on you. He was good at that. Few weeks back, Tian Leng was telling me about how people only get famous after they die when he was relating the story about Tan Sri Lim Goh Tong’s funeral procession and about how much Genting staff and students were paid to attend his funeral. Tian Leng, at 21 years old, with no money or possessions, armed only with his humour, humbleness and good nature, is blessed with sincere friends and family, and in my personal opinion, Tian Leng, if you lived till 89 like Tan Sri, you would be more famous than him.

I would like to end with an sms message which Tian Leng sent to me some time back. In his message, which was sent out-of-the-blue, he said “Eventhough I don’t know how to express my feelings, I don’t show love to you all but deep down in my heart, I do love you all a lot! I know I don’t show care and concern about you all but deep down inside I do. It’s because we are brought up in a way that we keep everything in our heart. It’s like a saying empty vessels make the most noise because they don’t think before they talk. I’m quiet because I use that time to think. If you have any problems in life just give me a buzz. I will help you as much as I can. I am willing to sacrifice my life just for you all. You may think that I am dumb and naïve and narrow-minded but its’ this type of people that can be trusted. That can be counted on when you need them.”

We love you very much and we will miss you dearly. Rest in peace, our beloved son, brother and friend.

Love, Hsieh May