i still can't believe that you're gone.
it's hard to describe how you and i both relate. sometimes, i consider it as the wonders of port dickson... like to me, u will always be there.
i guess i can say we;ve grown up together.. we all have, haven't we? the youth of port dickson.. the bond have always been there. it's just that, it never did cross my mind that someday.. as soon as now.. u will be gone..
we went to church together.. share the same bunch of friends.. same school.. same whatsoever.. and funny, even with so many things in common, we were merely just acquaintance. every time we meet.. we would greet each other shyly and as though we've only met for the very first time..
i see u whenever u'd drive ur 3331 pajero to my house and call my brother out..
i see u whenever kun is back.. and we would hang out till the wee hours of the morning.. eating wan tan mee..
i see u whenever we travel back and forth subang with kun.. and how both u and kun would just crack me up big time and made me swear over and over again that you both were the most hilarious yet compatible pair of best friends i've ever come across..
i see u whenever we would hang out by the beach.. chilling and drinking.. and talking cock..
i see u whenever i hear the jay chow song that both u and kun kept raving about once upon a time..
i see u everywhere..... and always cos u're the closest friend to both my brother and my bestest friend. both very important person in my life...
and suddenly, you expect me to believe that you're gone?
i don't know why it hurts this much.. maybe u've become a favorite friend of mine sub consciously.. i dunno...
ever since i was admitted to the hospital, until today,i've been silently praying for u..... i thought we could both work our ways out.. i'm sorry that my body fails me jack.. which was why i didn't even have a proper chance to say goodbye...
i wish i could've been there for you...
just like how u did when i had an accident months ago.. and cracked some stupid joke about morphin or something wtf.. i knew u were trying to make me feel better and it really did...
and just like how u will always be there.. albeit in silence...
its only memories now... memories of how great of a friend u were, how funny of a joker u've always been... how everybody just loves to have u around... i know how devastated my brother had been... and how lost my best friend kun were for the past couple of days... this is how much you're loved jack, do u know?
deep down inside, i know u'd continue to live in our memories... and i know u will ALWAYS be there....
and FOR THAT, jack, just wanna say that you will be deeply missed...
MAY YOU REST IN PEACE!
Chean Nee
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